Adam is Missing, Obama is in Town, The Most Electrifying Final Takes Place Tonight!!!

The top two teams are in hiding. But where is Adam “The Guv” Gard? After being extended the olive branch by BDS striker and all around gentleman “Hacksaw” Serris the entire Wallendas squad retreated to the aptly named Row the Boat. It’s a pleasure palace of earthly delights. But in the wee hours of the morning Adam left because as his note said “I’ve got some shit to take care of.”

We all hope he’s there in time, but Meister speculates that Adam may have seen the much heard about “Beach Patrol Signal” which is a silhouette of two naked ladies projected onto the clouds. Why he didn’t tell co-Beach Patroller Kevin Meister is anyone’s guess.

As reported in other blogs Barack Obama will be stopping by the lanes in order to try and bring some transparency to El Presidente’s corrupt regime. Said Obama aboard the Row the Boat last night:

                                “El Presidente’s administration in TNT has shown more corruption

                                than Teapot Dome and the XYZ Affair combined. I mean this guy

                                gives president’s a bad name. He makes Qadaffi look like a level-

                                headed guy.”

Obama went on to bowl a lousy 111, 117, 103. Though he did expense all the beers for the evening, while he polished off his third pin shaped Bud-Light he was heard to mumble:

                                “This bar tab is too big to fail. I'm the Commander-in-Chief

                                  and I declare this bar tab the responsibility of the Fed.”

But bear in mind though the two most dynamic teams ever to play in TNT history are safe from physical harm, being at sea and protected by the Obama supplied Navy S.E.A.L.S. Wallendas class clown Meister was subjected to the following obscene phone call around 3a.m.

Caller- Is this Kevin Fancy Pants Meister?

Kevin- It’s Kevin but all I’ve got on our my Frankenstein jammies.

Caller- That’s hot, I want to lick your ankles?

Kevin- Really? That’s cool.

Caller- (heavy breathing)

Kevin- (heavy breathing)

Caller- Why are you doing that?

Kevin- I thought we were doing the heavy breathing thing.

Caller- I am, you’re supposed to be freaked out.

Kevin- Yeah keep going. I’m grabbing my nipples now.

Caller- What the fuck? Seriously shut up.

Kevin- (heavy breathing)

Caller- Stop it!!!

Kevin- wait wait wait…oh yeah there it is. Thank you for being gentle.

Caller- You’re insane.

Kevin- I love you so much.