Four long weeks the Wallendas have suffered, they’ve
strived, they’ve anticipated and finally it is here. Meister debuts his
horribly inflated 158 pin average. Can he maintain that number? No freaking
way. He is screwed. Considering the slumping Doc Krull has one more week left
to establish and…oh yeah the formerly injured Trashman returns to the
Wallendas!!! fold.
CJ decided to announce to our esteemed captain Gard Dog that
he was ready. At least he asked:
 |
| As you can see, he suffered brain damage as well. |
Eventually all of the hubbub died down and we got down to
the business of ass destruction. Tonight The Bowling Wallendas!!! face off
against the new team Spare Us. Is that name clever? I can’t tell, I don’t
understand bowling references. At least it isn’t a overt-sexual-bowling
mish-mash name. At least it wasn’t until
now. Even with the 252 pins that the TBW!!! have to make up, I doubt TBW!!!
will be “sparing” that team the bowl-raping we intend to inflict upon them. I guarantee we will not be as kind to them as this animatronic mother is to her perverse tweener:
It’s a vital time at TNT, Il Padrino has made his usual
powerplays, none of which have born fruit. But this time TBW!!! has the inside
track on El Presidente. We’ve planted a spy within his close circle. His code
name is “Rowlsberg” and he has spent the last 3 years training for this
mission. His first stint was at Quantico training with the marines and FBI.
Then it was off to Navy SEALS training so he could learn how to snap a man’s
neck with his dick (security forbids us from posting the videos we have of him actually doing this, trust me it's freaking brutal). But his real training came in the form of Adam Gard and the
art of ninjitsu. When the time comes, it’ll be lights out for El Presidente. It
seems the only thing missing from his training was doing any actual bowling,
cause he is awful.
Meister Out
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